Valley Experiences

When everything seems to be going against you, remember the airplane takes off against the wind, not with it.

That’s from Henry Ford. Like many of my heroes, he discovered that adversity can be turned into opportunity by adjusting our attitudes. Ford’s close friend, Thomas Edison, struggled for many years trying to perfect the electric light. He quipped, “I didn’t fail 1,000 times. The lightbulb was an invention with 1,000 steps.”

Can you relate?

I was reflecting this morning on a movie my wife and I watched over the weekend. I realized that I get far more emotionally engaged with a character who overcomes adversity than I do with somebody’s overnight rise to fame and fortune. (In reality, virtually nobody becomes successful without navigating their own set of valley experiences.) I have learned to appreciate difficult obstacles for exactly what they offer — insight and growth to a new, higher level of understanding.  

That’s why I choose to replace retirement with intentional living. But getting there requires some discipline and grit.

Replacing Retirement with Intentional Living

For example, each morning I begin with prayer, exercise, reading, and journaling or writing. I commit to this habit 5 days a week, taking weekends and holidays off. When I first adopted this morning routine, I started just with the journaling, and I did it every single day for 90 days. (I’ve found the so-called 21-day rule for developing a habit never works for me. Perhaps I’m a slow learner.) The good news is that somewhere between 50 and 90 days, the daily habit no longer felt like a discipline but a joy!

Establishing Your Rhythm

I still find that most mornings, I genuinely enjoy my constructive regimen. One day, my wife (who is very supportive of my routines), asked, “Honey, could you skip the daily habit and spend this morning in bed with me?” I thought it would be okay to make an exception. And it was! Next day I was back to my morning ritual without interruption or even giving it much thought — primarily because I enjoyed how it made me feel; it had flipped from effort to reward.

That’s when I decided I could safely cut back to 6 days a week, and then finally down to 5 — where my daily alignment rhythm exists today. Over time, I added prayer, exercise, and writing, as well as expanding my reading to include both spiritual as well as personal development. 

Today, I schedule 90 minutes for the entire process.

The Benefits of Journaling and Reading

One of the benefits of journaling and reading is time to reflect on where I’ve succeeded and failed, and to draw connections or parallels on what happened. Recently, I was reading how valley experiences help us to be humble, grateful, reflective, empathetic, and insightful. Looking at these byproducts of struggle, I realized they are exactly the attributes I desire to develop.  

Valley Experiences can be the Pathway to the Character You Want

It’s as if the valley experiences — the low points — give me a quicker pathway to the very qualities I’m looking to attract and acquire. A dichotomy, if you will, but learning from these contradictions can build character and wisdom. Often, what appears to be a disappointment, a setback, or a frustration is, in fact, just the “other side of the coin” for something I’m struggling to achieve.   

Today I choose to look at both the mountains and the valleys of life as victories: The high points as victories to savor and enjoy, the low points as victories to study and learn from. There’s usually a deeper meaning and lesson buried just beneath the initial frustration and disappointment. Utilizing this lens on the world, I can tap into the genius and perseverance of Washington, Adams, Lincoln, and others who turned defeat into the foundational building blocks of ultimate victory.

Remember, the road to replacing retirement with intentional living isn’t marked by perfection, but the capacity to consistently overcome (and learn from) adversity.